Men strike back! ! ! ! ! ! !

underdog · **Posted:** Feb Mon 13, 2006 2:11 pm

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it. :mrgreen:

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Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you. :mrgreen:

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Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.

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How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me...":mrgreen:
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How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.

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Why do men fart more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to
build up the required pressure. :mrgreen:

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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in. :mrgreen:

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What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do ! what she's told. :mrgreen:

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I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always. :mrgreen:

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Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes
a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake. :mrgreen:

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Why do men die before their wives?
They want to. :mrgreen:

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Women will never be equal to men until they can
walk down the street with a bald head and a beer
gut, and still think they are sexy. :mrgreen:

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In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested. :mrgreen:

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bbnova · **Posted:** Feb Mon 13, 2006 2:19 pm

RICK MILLER · **Posted:** Feb Mon 13, 2006 2:42 pm

underdog · **Posted:** Feb Mon 13, 2006 2:43 pm

LMAO, Some of those are REAL good, LOL

bbnova · **Posted:** Feb Mon 13, 2006 2:48 pm

Nothing from the females huh?????

docoldsotherhalf · **Posted:** Feb Mon 13, 2006 2:57 pm

32 Reasons why Cookie Dough is better than men.

1)It's enjoyable hard or soft.
2)It makes a mess too, but it tastes better.
3)It doesn't mind if you take your anger out on it.
4)You always want to swallow.
5)It won't complain if you share it with friends.
6)It's "quick and convenient."
7)You can enjoy it more than once.

It comes already protectively wrapped.
9)You can make it as large as you want.
10)If you don't finish it you can save it for later.
11)It's easier to get the kind you want.
12)You can comparison shop.
13)It's easier to find in a grocery store.
14)You can put it away when you've had enough.
15)You know yours has never been eaten before.
16)It won't complain if you chew on it.
17)It comes chocolate flavored.
18)You always know when to get rid of it.
19)You can return it--satisfaction is guaranteed.
20)It's always ready to go.
21)You won't get arrested if you eat it in public.
22)You don't have to change the sheets if you eat it in bed.
23)It won't wake you up because it's hard.
24)You don't have to find an excuse not to eat it.
25)You can tell your friends how much you've eaten without sounding like you're bragging.
26)It won't take up room in your bed.
27)It's easy to pick up.
28)You never have unwanted cookie dough chasing you around.
29)You know what the extra weight is from.
30)It won't get jealous if you pick up another one.
31)It never has an insecurity problem with its size.
32)It is very pliable.